The 2005 New Line comedy classic, Wedding Crashers, featured Vince Vaughn and Owen Wilson as a couple of guys who drop in on weddings to have some laughs, eat good food, and meet some girls. People helping people! Vince Vaughn’s character is very loud and garish whereas Owen Wilson’s character is more reserved, more patient with what he wants (Rachel McAdams)… he’s more subtle.
What is a subtle guy like? They don’t have to always be heard by everyone. The subtle guy is able to hang back and interject the perfect joke at the perfect time. You know the guy, a comedy ninja. As he’s listening to his date, he lays out a perfect line – one that shows he’s listening and quick on his feet. A subtle guy also doesn’t need to brag. He does great things and lets his actions speak for themselves. Unlike the loud “one upper” as I like to call them. Don't be afraid of “awkward silences”. See those moments actually as a great time to try to see what the other person’s eyes are telling you.
There’s no need to be the loud guy. Sure, there’s a time and a place, but a gentleman will realize that it’s best to think about what he says and does. Live passionately, but also be thoughtful. It’s great to go after what you want in life and seize what you find beautiful and inspiring, but be patient too – some things are best when the time is right.
Take for example Owen Wilson’s character. He falls for the perfect girl; things don’t work out and actually go really badly for him. What does he do? What would you do? He doesn’t freak out and do the wrong thing and, on the flip side, he doesn’t give up. He patiently works hard at being the right guy for the right girl. In the end, it all works out, because he’s been quietly being a good man.
Patience brothers – good things will happen if you’re doing the right thing and working hard at what you want. And always, always, be thoughtful.
Nice, Joel. Very well said.
ReplyDeleteThanks Dave (and/or) Stephanie. That's cool of you to say.
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