If a guy acts like a gentleman, but doesn't have genuine gratitude for those around him, others will see through him and think he has some ulterior motive. Let's face it though, even if we are sincerely grateful, we all want something. If we go out to eat, we hope for great service. If we go on a date, we (usually) hope for another. Try to appreciate that you are interacting with another person, who like you, has hopes and emotions. For example, your server is probably hoping you'll be a considerate customer. Your date hopes you'll be fun and thoughtful. Don't simply look at people as a means to an end.
This is kindergarden stuff. It's simple, but make sure to always sincerely say, "Thank you." But even better, find something that the other person did that stood out to you and comment on it. This could be something like, "Thanks for getting lunch with me. You're really funny and easy to talk with." A sentiment like that is good for a note or an email. Otherwise, it's always a good idea to thank someone for their time or effort. People appreciate being recognized for those sacrifices.
On a related note, here's my personal standard for gratitude with people who serve me: I always give 20% tip. It's easy, it's customary to tip, and that little extra makes the other person's day. Here's the simple math:
Take your bill > divide by 10 > then double it!
Simple, right? $20 lunch - divide by 10 = $2, then double it = $4 Easy enough!
How does this gratitude stuff sound? Do you think you can handle it? Now it's my turn...
Thank you for reading this first official blog post. I look forward to discussing trends and topics about "all things gentleman-ish." I'd love your feedback!
Thank you.
Awesome post and great topic. I cannot wait to read more. For my birthday one year, I got the book, "How to be a Gentleman." One of the best books I have ever received. I learned so much from that book and one of the main focus points is gratitude. I highly recommend it.
ReplyDeleteThanks Jason! I'm glad to hear that I was on the right track. I'll have to look into that book.
ReplyDeleteLove it Joel! I wish there were more guys, or people in general for that matter, who would all have a bit more gratitude. I think working a job in retail is a good place to become a better person when out in public as well. After being treated by ungrateful people in the retail business, I'm 100X nicer when out shopping or at a restaurant myself.
ReplyDeleteAwesome thoughts, Amber. I couldn't agree more. I also worked in retail and sympathize with others in the service industry. If only people could all have that experience for a month or two to get a little perspective (like the fact that the world doesn't revolve around them).
ReplyDeleteJoel, I love it! Now more guys need to get guy'd. I really appreciate that you started it with gratitude - as Americans I think we take so much for granted.
ReplyDeleteI couldn't agree more, JSP. I'm an idealist, so I hope more people will become grateful. It just takes a bunch of people to try to show that it's important to be grateful. BTW - thanks for pointing out that I misspelled "wit." Good catch!
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